More Intro (And More Ramblings)

Alrighty…

My first post should’ve and would’ve been my intro if I hadn’t gotten too carried away in explaining my choice of URL and blog name.

Nevertheless, just to give you guys an overview; I meant to have this blog purely as an outlet for my uber delayed fics-in-the-making.

I promised myself not to post my grumblings and random thoughts here but for the purpose of an “intro” I still think it’s somewhat necessary.

So here I am almost in my mid-20′s (no use hiding my age since it’s in my profile anyways) and seemingly having a “quarter-life” crisis. I’m not exactly sure what finally pushed me; although I would say that it wouldn’t really take much since i’ve always been inclined to (i’m talking about writing here). But since going to college and working it’s like I had to put a rein on my over-active imagination. Oh I still daydream a lot I tell you — but they’ve all been bottled up in my head these past 8 years….

 

Wait, WHAT?! 8 years?! Holy crap! No wonder I feel like i’m practically fading into oblivion.

 

So there, ironically despite of the physical and financial freedom I got once I entered college and more so once I started working, it was also the time that my will has become an unwitting prisoner of reality.

Back when I was in elementary and high school my creativity simply flourished! I’m not bragging just to make me look awesome. But looking back I even surprise myself with my talents. If it was the present me I don’t think I would’ve been able to accomplish the things I did.

I wasn’t even banking on my skills:  I was simply enjoying them…making up songs, writing scripts and musicals, directing classroom presentations, writing poems, novelettes, short-stories, etc. And I did all those not because I was required to, but for the sheer enjoyment of it.

But then stepping into the adult world, selfish fancies has to be let go to become practical. I took a business course thinking: “I can always write in my spare time”. But then came mid-terms, then finals, then thesis. Before I knew it, the only writing that I was able to do were classroom presentations, researches and defence papers.

 

Then came graduation.  And then it became all about work.

 

My profession didn’t require me to be creative; at least not in the way that I wanted to be. Spending practically 12 hours, 6 days a week at work — plus the 2-4 hour commute — leaves me with only 8 more hours for myself.  I normally sleep 4-6 hours each day. With the excess free hours left to do some form of unwinding. Although I find writing extremely relieving, I just can’t find myself writing my stories in snippets.

I’m the kind of person who can be really lazy, but when I start doing something; I just can’t bring myself to stop half-way. I get obsessive in that sense.  Call it adrenaline rush or riding the momentum. But I just get better as I go on. And more so in writing, it’s hard to stop once you start with the story lest you lose the inspiration. I rarely outline my stories. I normally figure out my plot and my characters, but I let my stories evolve as  I write. I could have a preferred ending but sometimes my “endings” don’t usually go the way I originally planned it.

 

After all those years of locked-up frustration, i’ve finally decided: “enough!” the hell with everything!  I’ll do what I want. Especially now that I have my precious (absentmindedly strokes laptop), we’ll conquer the world! ……. Well not really, just being able to write again is enough.

I don’t even expect to have a religious following in my blogs. I only want to post them so that I can share these “imaginary worlds” that i’ve created in my head.

I’ve always had a weird way of story-telling:  Non-conformist to some. And I expect that not a lot of people would appreciate my style. But then, it’s just as they say: “different strokes for different folks”. Although I write with the consciousness that I would (probably) have readers, the most important thing is that I write for myself. Although I do hope that my stories would, in one way or another, touch other people; still I have to make sure that I am aware of the fact that i’m writing for myself.  Because I want to; not because I need to. And definitely not because I need to please somebody.

So with my intro all done, I probably won’t be posting anything new until maybe mid of next month. Haha!  Of course I don’t want to post anything incomplete. Or maybe I would, let’s see how things go.

Eventually i’ll be posting works of other authors (maybe, maybe not) but of course not without their permission.

I’ll maybe post some of my random thoughts about the stories i’m writing. But i’ll keep it to that. What’s the point of having this blog if I mix everything anyways.

So there, ja ne (for now).

Most of the stuff i’ll be posting will be related to FanFiction (since i’m totally hooked on Anime) but i’ll probably include purely fiction stories (i’ll have to dig up some of my old works). A lot of Anime characters are really fun to use and I can still use them OOC.

So I do hope you watch out for the reborn me (banzai!)

Till next time ^_^